The humorless humor of “Sir” Robert Jones (Aug. 29, 2012)

29 August 2012 at 11:45 am

The humorless humor of “Sir” Robert Jones
Wednesday 29 August 2012

If you have ever wasted a few hours and struggled through one of his dire self-published “satirical” novellas, you will be aware that the thuggish property speculator “Sir” Robert Jones fancies himself as a humorist. Perhaps his favorite humorous remark over the last few years is this drily delivered comment on gay rights: “Now you can go off and marry your horse if you want!”

No, I don’t think it’s funny either. But when Jones delivers that piece of comedy gold in front of a servile and intimidated host like Richard Griffin or Radio Sport’s Graham Hill, it always elicits a guffaw. Whether the guffaw is sincere or simply dutiful is a moot point.

Jones’s humour might not be for everyone, certainly not anyone with a sense of humour, but he still has his admirers in the media. For example, if you were sad enough to listen to yesterday’s edition of “The Huddle” on NewstalkZB, you will have heard this….

LARRY WILLIAMS: This government report wants school breakfasts to be provided at low decile schools. Ha ha ha! I see they reckon it would be for 850 schools! Ha ha ha!

DEBORAH CODDINGTON: Why can’t the local community just get together at the church hall and provide these breakfasts? Why does it always have to be the government?

LARRY WILLIAMS: Exactly. All right, gay marriage.

JOCK ANDERSON: I’m against it. It’s just politicians cozying up to gays, many of whom happen to be my friends I might add!

LARRY WILLIAMS: Ha ha ha!

JOCK ANDERSON: But I’m against it.

LARRY WILLIAMS: Deborah, what do you think?

DEBORAH CODDINGTON: I disagree with Jock. They can marry their CAT for all I care!

JOCK ANDERSON: Haw haw haw haw haw!

LARRY WILLIAMS: Ha ha ha ha ha! That’s what Bob Jones says, isn’t it! Ha ha ha ha ha!

DEBORAH CODDINGTON: Yes I think it is! Ha ha ha ha ha!

JOCK ANDERSON: Haw haw haw haw haw!

LARRY WILLIAMS: Thanks, Deborah and Jock. Up next: Murray Deaker!

• Morrissey10.1

  29 August 2012 at 5:49 pm

  UPDATE!

  I’ve just heard that noted wit the Rt. Hon. Maurice Williamson quip to reporters, with the division bells ringing in the background, that he had “heard someone say that now you can marry your dog”.

  Evidently the Rt. Hon. member finds that to be a particularly clever comment.
  • Anne10.1.1

    29 August 2012 at 6:03 pm

    How in God’s name can you bear to listen to 1ZB Morrissey? It’s worse than Radio Live. Once in a blue moon I stop and listen to Leighton Smith while passing through the ether. I have never had to wait more than five minutes for the inevitable tirade of abuse towards all believers of Climate Change. I really believe this man has a serious mental disorder where the subject of Climate Change is concerned.
    • Morrissey10.1.1.1

      29 August 2012 at 6:49 pm

      How in God’s name can you bear to listen to 1ZB Morrissey?

      I listen to it so you don’t have to, Anne.

      It’s worse than Radio Live.

      While Radio Live has some excellent hosts, such as Keith Stewart, Karen and Andrew, and some of the Sunday people, there are also some pretty braindead people there. Here are a few of their most egregious bottom-trawlers: Michael Laws, Mitch Harris, Martin Devlin, John Matheson, Hamish McKay.

      And the godawful Maggie Barry had a slot there until raised to the level of her incompetence last November.
      • Anne10.1.1.1.1

        29 August 2012 at 6:56 pm

        I listen to it so you don’t have to, Anne.

        Thanks (grin).

        That godawful Maggie Barry is my MP. I note she’s after Jacinda Ardern’s blood.

        Jealousy will get you nowhere Maggie dear!
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